I don't know about you but my brain seems to run in a hundred different directions at a time. It's kinda like a magic eight ball being constantly and violently shaken with hundreds of answers, questions, criticisms, and concerns flying past the little opening at the top. Their are a couple of different remedies for an overstimulated mind, however the consumption of massive quantities of alcohol might be killing brain cells instead of relieving them. So like most people I keep myself overly busy in an attempt to direct the endless flow of thoughts from consuming my grasp on reality. One of these activities is a Monday evening fitness club to encourage others to enjoy nature through exercise and maintain that firm butt God gave me. Occasionally my comrades in prolonged leg torture are busy with ridiculous things like jobs, family, studying; which leaves our mountain trail alone for me to conquer alone.
If you have been following along (I know its hard not to focus on that tight butt I mentioned earlier ;) then you may have connected the dots on why running by myself with no mental distractions (I don't like running with headphones) might be a potentially intimidating problem. A whole hour to just let my mind roam? why don't you just drop a crack addict into a coca field and see what happens.
But there I was, jogging down the trail, and somewhere between realizing I should have peed before starting, and that Kesha song stuck in my head (I was in traffic and it was on like every damn station, don't judge me!) there was..... silence. Sweet, sweet silence. A beautiful twilight zone where even the dirtiest Kesha hook couldn't invade my zone. In dragon ball Z terms, I think I went super sayain. I realized that while I am a people person and love being involved in as much as possible, a little silence to myself is equally important for sanity. A friend once said, "a little silence is better than sex". I always thought he just wasn't doing it right, but I think the truth behind that statement became a bit more clear that night. So, yes Kesha lets make the most of the night and enjoy time of silence and meditation.
Also, so everyone else can get this stuck in their head:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BmV2zPXMzdI
Monday, October 22, 2012
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
What to do When Your Sick
It is now officially fall, even here in Georgia. I love fall it is probably my favorite season, but it also brings the terrible 'Fall Cold' everyone around you seems to have and chooses to sneeze on you. I currently have it, most of my friends either had it or are going to get it, and I'm sure my mother will get it conveniently when I'm home for Thanksgiving. (that turkey doesn't cook itself ma!)
The real challenge is how to maintain your healthy lifestyle when all you want to do is lay around and re-watch the entirety of Freaks and Geeks? Well depending on the longevity of your illness their are a few different solutions to your pumpkin flavored illness.
1. Get plenty of rest! This probably sounds redundant but give yourself a day off for goodness sakes. Skip a class, call in to work, say no to water boarding that new terrorist your boss just brought back from Syria. I know personally I tend to be a work-aholic who rarely says no to a good time. This works for me most of the time but the body needs time to recover and taking a day off to get plenty of sleep and a lil you time might be just what you need.
2. When it comes to working out unless you're totally bed ridden you don't have to stop. The body can handle a lot more than you realize, and exercise does help in detoxing and staying healthy. The trick here is to cut back on your normal workout. Don't worry about not reaching your 'usual' goals when you workout. Your 'usual' goals are just not attainable in the current state your body is in. Know that your body will thank you and recover quickly if you don't over-exert it during your recovery period. Save that for the following week when your at 100%.
3. Maintain healthy eating habits, possibly reduce caloric intake. If you are not already doing so try to eat a healthy and fully balanced diet. I know it is hard, I'm a poor college student who would love nothing more than eating pork belly and ramen noodles most nights. Do not fall into the trap that eating healthy is expensive. Don't try to eat like a movie star, they usually just pay a nutritionist to wake them up at 3am to eat a plate of plain chicken anyway. Fuck that. I want to eat at normal times, and with some flavor baby! When your sick your body needs fuel just like any other time so don't forget to fill it with good choices. However if your trying to lose weight and injured or on the sick side a reduction in what your eating may help maintain body and shouldn't screw up your metabolic rate too much. Besides most people have a reduced appetite when they are sick.
4. Don't be afraid of going to the doctor. I know health insurance is expensive and many young people do not have it but sometimes the best way to get over an illness is to nut up and visit the old white jacket. If you are a student most colleges offer free nurse visits with little cost. Also the rumored free or discount clinics do exist if you are willing to wait in line. If you are really that sick, be an adult and go to the doctor so you can get your life back on track.
Good luck to all with fall illness, I hope your pumpkin carving, cool morning jogging, and flannel wearing are not too interrupted!
The real challenge is how to maintain your healthy lifestyle when all you want to do is lay around and re-watch the entirety of Freaks and Geeks? Well depending on the longevity of your illness their are a few different solutions to your pumpkin flavored illness.
1. Get plenty of rest! This probably sounds redundant but give yourself a day off for goodness sakes. Skip a class, call in to work, say no to water boarding that new terrorist your boss just brought back from Syria. I know personally I tend to be a work-aholic who rarely says no to a good time. This works for me most of the time but the body needs time to recover and taking a day off to get plenty of sleep and a lil you time might be just what you need.
2. When it comes to working out unless you're totally bed ridden you don't have to stop. The body can handle a lot more than you realize, and exercise does help in detoxing and staying healthy. The trick here is to cut back on your normal workout. Don't worry about not reaching your 'usual' goals when you workout. Your 'usual' goals are just not attainable in the current state your body is in. Know that your body will thank you and recover quickly if you don't over-exert it during your recovery period. Save that for the following week when your at 100%.
3. Maintain healthy eating habits, possibly reduce caloric intake. If you are not already doing so try to eat a healthy and fully balanced diet. I know it is hard, I'm a poor college student who would love nothing more than eating pork belly and ramen noodles most nights. Do not fall into the trap that eating healthy is expensive. Don't try to eat like a movie star, they usually just pay a nutritionist to wake them up at 3am to eat a plate of plain chicken anyway. Fuck that. I want to eat at normal times, and with some flavor baby! When your sick your body needs fuel just like any other time so don't forget to fill it with good choices. However if your trying to lose weight and injured or on the sick side a reduction in what your eating may help maintain body and shouldn't screw up your metabolic rate too much. Besides most people have a reduced appetite when they are sick.
4. Don't be afraid of going to the doctor. I know health insurance is expensive and many young people do not have it but sometimes the best way to get over an illness is to nut up and visit the old white jacket. If you are a student most colleges offer free nurse visits with little cost. Also the rumored free or discount clinics do exist if you are willing to wait in line. If you are really that sick, be an adult and go to the doctor so you can get your life back on track.
Good luck to all with fall illness, I hope your pumpkin carving, cool morning jogging, and flannel wearing are not too interrupted!
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
Anniversary
Hooorray! It is finally October! I love October for the weather as well as the fall activities which seem endless. October holds a special significance to me because it was one year ago in October when I first started running. It was a rainy day, much like the weather we have been having recently. It was raining so much that I wore a raincoat on my first run! Yesterday I went running in the rain shirtless because of my new appreciation for rainy weather. That day one year ago I could have let the rain turn me away and say 'tomorrow' but something inside pushed me out into the balmy forecast and forced me to run that now pitiful 1/4 mile. I ran 7 miles in the rain last night.
I bring this up as inspiration, not just for bragging rights (I'm the humblest person here! no one is more humble than me!). My story is not unique, their are plenty of inspirational stories of people overcoming tremendous odds to lose weight and be healthy. Really all I am bringing to the table is an average Joe perspective that it can be done. People, including myself, are always seeking for the miracle exercise or activity which will make them look like Brad Pitt or Gisele Bundchen (I don't know ladies, is that a good example?). Well that secret exercise is hard work! It is hard losing weight, it is hard forcing yourself to get out and be active everyday, but the goal is lifestyle change not 3 month change.
While thinking about this anniversary running last night, I was reminded of the Biblical idea that your body is a temple. While you may view that principle differently according to your own beliefs, I really enjoy that concept that my body is a temple. Don't get me wrong not all temples are built the same or look alike, but every temple needs a caretaker who respects the grounds and keeps it clean and functioning. If your temple is in ruins who is going to want to go there? This does not have to mean living in a commune, giving up red meat, and never going out for a drink, it just means that we cannot neglect our bodies need for movement, and clean energy.
Whatever state your body maybe in you need to accept yourself and be secure in your own skin. If you do not like your temple at all then the problem lies deeper than just sweeping the floor. However if you are at a place where you are ready to clean house and make some changes for a better life than be encouraged sisters and brothers, go forth and move!
I bring this up as inspiration, not just for bragging rights (I'm the humblest person here! no one is more humble than me!). My story is not unique, their are plenty of inspirational stories of people overcoming tremendous odds to lose weight and be healthy. Really all I am bringing to the table is an average Joe perspective that it can be done. People, including myself, are always seeking for the miracle exercise or activity which will make them look like Brad Pitt or Gisele Bundchen (I don't know ladies, is that a good example?). Well that secret exercise is hard work! It is hard losing weight, it is hard forcing yourself to get out and be active everyday, but the goal is lifestyle change not 3 month change.
While thinking about this anniversary running last night, I was reminded of the Biblical idea that your body is a temple. While you may view that principle differently according to your own beliefs, I really enjoy that concept that my body is a temple. Don't get me wrong not all temples are built the same or look alike, but every temple needs a caretaker who respects the grounds and keeps it clean and functioning. If your temple is in ruins who is going to want to go there? This does not have to mean living in a commune, giving up red meat, and never going out for a drink, it just means that we cannot neglect our bodies need for movement, and clean energy.
Whatever state your body maybe in you need to accept yourself and be secure in your own skin. If you do not like your temple at all then the problem lies deeper than just sweeping the floor. However if you are at a place where you are ready to clean house and make some changes for a better life than be encouraged sisters and brothers, go forth and move!
Thursday, September 20, 2012
Happy Thorsday!
As my Thor training progresses I keep finding new motivations to keep putting one foot in front of the other. I finally returned to Facebook much to the delight of many close to me and to the dismay of a silent I'm sure. Going through some old photos I found some rather disturbing photos of myself from back in the day. Dang! I was a big boy! Now I'm not gonna rant about how disgusting I was, it was a part of my life which is now behind me but it does give me endless motivation to get my butt out there and run everyday.
Another inspiration was a story I heard on the way to class listening to the Bert Show, about host Jeff Dauler who recently completed a triathlon and who's two main pieces of advice were:
“In times of transition, keep moving forward.” It doesn’t matter how you do it, as long as you keep going forward.
Another inspiration was a story I heard on the way to class listening to the Bert Show, about host Jeff Dauler who recently completed a triathlon and who's two main pieces of advice were:
“In times of transition, keep moving forward.” It doesn’t matter how you do it, as long as you keep going forward.
And ”Remain calm. One step at a time is all you need to do.”
Hear more at: http://thebertshow.com/be-inspired-how-life-lessons-from-jeffs-triathlon-can-affect-your-life-now/
For anyone just starting an exercise regimen or facing any transition in life it can be easy to lay down and let life pass you by, but if you keep moving and taking everything one step, one day at a time anything can be accomplished.
In a slight transition I begin my 'cut down' phase of my Thor regimen which means removing unhealthy items from my diet and increasing cardio workouts. *sigh* This is the hardest part for me solely because I love eating so much! I happened upon a friend going through food tumblrs the other day..... it was like torture for my belly.
But I have to stick to it to arrive at the finish line. So here we go: The main carbs eaten by people are breads, potatoes and rice. This week I remove potatoes, next bread, then other negative aspect of my food group. It is these small steps in changing my diet for the better which will enable me to cross that finish line...... but in the mean time bruthas gonna need plenty of help! so if you see me downing hash browns knock that fork outa my hands!
Happy Thorsday all!
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
A Body Like The Thunder God Himself!
Starting today I am revamping my workouts to prepare my body for Halloween. That's right folks, this year I am going balls to the wall in my pursuit of dressing up as Thor the god of thunder for Halloween. This is actually in partnership with a few friends who are all taking on different roles from the avengers (pictures to follow). But why Thor? why not the Hulk or Nick Fury?
I have had to finally admit to myself that while I always desired a tight, skinny jeans wearing emo kid body, in reality my physical shape is more conducive to body builder style exercises. *sigh* However instead of lamenting this fact I have chosen to embrace it fully and utilize it for an awesome costume this October. So for the next two months most of the posts here will be updates on my progress, workouts I'm using, and healthy food options that I'm using to reach my goal.
I have had to finally admit to myself that while I always desired a tight, skinny jeans wearing emo kid body, in reality my physical shape is more conducive to body builder style exercises. *sigh* However instead of lamenting this fact I have chosen to embrace it fully and utilize it for an awesome costume this October. So for the next two months most of the posts here will be updates on my progress, workouts I'm using, and healthy food options that I'm using to reach my goal.
Now why not accept my current state of fitness instead of work my ass off for a costume I may wear only twice? Recently this project of mine came up in conversation when a friend/asshole pretty much said the equivalent of, "I don't think you can do it". .......... Clearly this person misunderstands my motivations, because I am a very competitive person and when someone tells me I can't do something I want to prove them wrong. As the saying goes, The best revenge is success. So to all the haters out there, enjoy dressing up as Loki, I'll be the one swinging the hammer.
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
Feast on the Cheap
A quick divergence towards cooking again. I am a full time student with a full time job so eating well without frivolously spending money can be difficult. However, I have mastered certain basic principles which can be applied over and over which will keep your belly full, lips smackin, and wallet a little heavier so you can spend your money on true items of value..... like alcohol.
Lets be honest meat is rather delicious, and especially in America we have come to expect it to be a central component of every meal. This is a big one which you will have to strike from your prejudices about food if you truly desire to eat in a less expensive and healthier way, but still with plenty of taste. The trick is to find substitutes for protein which are more affordable. I'm not saying meat is bad, theirs nothing I love more than a good steak, or meaty pork ribs, but I don't usually have the time, funds, or energy to make such a culinary endeavor work.
This first recipe post will give some ideas for meatless, tasty substitutes low in cost and time to prepare:
I came up with this the other night after a day full of lifting weights and hiking/running up a mountain which left me famished and nearly passing out behind the wheel on the drive home.
For 2 people
4 medium sized red potatoes
1 can of sweet corn or substitute fresh corn if available
1/4 an onion
1/2 jalepeno pepper
3-6 pieces of okra or any other quick cooking vegetable to taste
salt and pepper to taste
1/2 cup of milk
Boil potatoes till soft, drain and remove from heat.
Chop onion, jalapeno, and okra and add to heated skillet with olive oil.
Once veggies begin to get soft add corn and salt and pepper. When all ingredients are acclimated to each other add the milk, stir till combined. On medium to low heat allow corn mixture to cook down till practically all the milk is gone creating a cream corn like consistency. Now while the corn is finishing take your finished potatoes drain, skin if you desire, and taking a spoon or potato masher quickly turn them into yummy lumps. Feel free to add a little milk or butter, salt and pepper to the mix to taste. When the corn is finished pour over your mashed potatoes and now you have potatoes with cream corn gravy!
Would you look at that, no meat, little fat, rather filling and you probably spent less 5-6 buck on the ingredients with leftovers for lunch. YO to the LO.
Lets be honest meat is rather delicious, and especially in America we have come to expect it to be a central component of every meal. This is a big one which you will have to strike from your prejudices about food if you truly desire to eat in a less expensive and healthier way, but still with plenty of taste. The trick is to find substitutes for protein which are more affordable. I'm not saying meat is bad, theirs nothing I love more than a good steak, or meaty pork ribs, but I don't usually have the time, funds, or energy to make such a culinary endeavor work.
This first recipe post will give some ideas for meatless, tasty substitutes low in cost and time to prepare:
I came up with this the other night after a day full of lifting weights and hiking/running up a mountain which left me famished and nearly passing out behind the wheel on the drive home.
For 2 people
4 medium sized red potatoes
1 can of sweet corn or substitute fresh corn if available
1/4 an onion
1/2 jalepeno pepper
3-6 pieces of okra or any other quick cooking vegetable to taste
salt and pepper to taste
1/2 cup of milk
Boil potatoes till soft, drain and remove from heat.
Chop onion, jalapeno, and okra and add to heated skillet with olive oil.
Once veggies begin to get soft add corn and salt and pepper. When all ingredients are acclimated to each other add the milk, stir till combined. On medium to low heat allow corn mixture to cook down till practically all the milk is gone creating a cream corn like consistency. Now while the corn is finishing take your finished potatoes drain, skin if you desire, and taking a spoon or potato masher quickly turn them into yummy lumps. Feel free to add a little milk or butter, salt and pepper to the mix to taste. When the corn is finished pour over your mashed potatoes and now you have potatoes with cream corn gravy!
Would you look at that, no meat, little fat, rather filling and you probably spent less 5-6 buck on the ingredients with leftovers for lunch. YO to the LO.
Saturday, August 4, 2012
Ragu for me and you
Deep down their is a yearning in my soul for an old school Italian grandmother. This is not to say that my real grandmothers, proud Scottish women they were, were not good cooks; but lets be honest that deep seated stereotype of an Italian grandmother always cooking something delicious lingers in my thoughts like sand in your flip flops after a day at the beach. Well today I attempted to compensate for the lack of Italian grandmother in my life by making some old school Ragu sauce.
Forget the jar of Ragu you see at the supermarket, cause that ketchupey mess have no place in this old school cucina. I started this adventure knowing I wanted some tough pieces of meat with plenty of bone to flavor my sauce. While everyone may have a different interpretation of what Ragu is, I think of a meaty blend of pork, beef, possibly chicken or sausage, and of course lots of fresh tomatoes.
For the meat I decided to go a little easier on myself and shorten the potential cooking time and hassle by picking up some pork short ribs and chicken drumsticks. I skipped the sausage this time because I would have had to make an extra trip and it was hotter than dammit out so I went straight home to start this four hour process of deliciousness.
Chris's Italian (Faux) Grandmother's Ragu
2lbs of pork short ribs
2lbs of chicken drumsticks
4lbs of tomatoes (I used about 8 fresh tomatoes but if you want more or less sauce do it to taste)
1 yellow onion
3 cloves of garlic
1 carrots
2 celery stems
handfuls of basil, rosemary, oregano or whatever Mediterranean herbs you have on hand
salt and pepper to taste
Begin by knocking out the sauce part, dice up the onion, garlic, carrot, and celery then add to your sauce pan with a generous lug of olive oil. Salt and pepper and allow to sweat out their juices. Dice up the tomato and herbs, add to onion mixture when the veggies look partially done. Allow the tomatoes and herbs to meld together and leave on low heat to allow everything to soak up each others flavor. After a while either in batches in the blender or with a hand beater, blend up the veggies into a smooth sauce and set aside on low heat.
In the meantime heat up the pan your going to be finishing your dish in, preferably a dutch oven or large pot. Add a dash of olive oil then add meat in batches to sear on both sides. Do not over cook the meat here the goal is just to flavor the pan and lock in the juices. Once all the meat has been cooked off and removed from the pan choose a deglazing medium. The best option to deglaze with is red wine but if none is on hand extra chicken stock or even just water will work. Scrape up the bits of meat from the pan with the deglazing liquid and allow it to simmer down. Once the liquid is reduced by half add the tomato sauce and mix in together. Add the meat back in and cover the pan on a low heat.
Now all that's left is to left it cook for about 2-3 hours and let the meat dissolve into the sauce. When the time approaches boil up some pasta and try to pick out any bones in the sauce. Mix together and enjoy a not so traditional but still Italian experience!
Forget the jar of Ragu you see at the supermarket, cause that ketchupey mess have no place in this old school cucina. I started this adventure knowing I wanted some tough pieces of meat with plenty of bone to flavor my sauce. While everyone may have a different interpretation of what Ragu is, I think of a meaty blend of pork, beef, possibly chicken or sausage, and of course lots of fresh tomatoes.
For the meat I decided to go a little easier on myself and shorten the potential cooking time and hassle by picking up some pork short ribs and chicken drumsticks. I skipped the sausage this time because I would have had to make an extra trip and it was hotter than dammit out so I went straight home to start this four hour process of deliciousness.
Chris's Italian (Faux) Grandmother's Ragu
2lbs of pork short ribs
2lbs of chicken drumsticks
4lbs of tomatoes (I used about 8 fresh tomatoes but if you want more or less sauce do it to taste)
1 yellow onion
3 cloves of garlic
1 carrots
2 celery stems
handfuls of basil, rosemary, oregano or whatever Mediterranean herbs you have on hand
salt and pepper to taste
Begin by knocking out the sauce part, dice up the onion, garlic, carrot, and celery then add to your sauce pan with a generous lug of olive oil. Salt and pepper and allow to sweat out their juices. Dice up the tomato and herbs, add to onion mixture when the veggies look partially done. Allow the tomatoes and herbs to meld together and leave on low heat to allow everything to soak up each others flavor. After a while either in batches in the blender or with a hand beater, blend up the veggies into a smooth sauce and set aside on low heat.
In the meantime heat up the pan your going to be finishing your dish in, preferably a dutch oven or large pot. Add a dash of olive oil then add meat in batches to sear on both sides. Do not over cook the meat here the goal is just to flavor the pan and lock in the juices. Once all the meat has been cooked off and removed from the pan choose a deglazing medium. The best option to deglaze with is red wine but if none is on hand extra chicken stock or even just water will work. Scrape up the bits of meat from the pan with the deglazing liquid and allow it to simmer down. Once the liquid is reduced by half add the tomato sauce and mix in together. Add the meat back in and cover the pan on a low heat.
Now all that's left is to left it cook for about 2-3 hours and let the meat dissolve into the sauce. When the time approaches boil up some pasta and try to pick out any bones in the sauce. Mix together and enjoy a not so traditional but still Italian experience!
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Squash Me Please!
Well I'm finally getting around to a food entry which many have suspected this whole bloggin endeavor maybe about. So with out further ado lets get cookin!
I Love squash, I even capitalized the L back there so you might better understand the emphasis I'm putting on this. Here in Georgia summer means one thing besides sweating and braves games, wonderful produce! Tomatoes, cucumbers, squash, all sorts of delicious greens, yellows, reds they make me giddy just thinking of them. I came up with this dish the other week while strolling through a farmers market. I was about done with the overpriced bourgeois selection these so called farmers were peddling (honestly the closer farmers markets get to urban areas the worse the prices get). However I was struck by these beautiful UFO looking squash just waiting to be sauteed. Buying two with a tomato and jalapeno I hurried home to complete my Frankenstein creation.
Sunburst Squash Tacos
I Love squash, I even capitalized the L back there so you might better understand the emphasis I'm putting on this. Here in Georgia summer means one thing besides sweating and braves games, wonderful produce! Tomatoes, cucumbers, squash, all sorts of delicious greens, yellows, reds they make me giddy just thinking of them. I came up with this dish the other week while strolling through a farmers market. I was about done with the overpriced bourgeois selection these so called farmers were peddling (honestly the closer farmers markets get to urban areas the worse the prices get). However I was struck by these beautiful UFO looking squash just waiting to be sauteed. Buying two with a tomato and jalapeno I hurried home to complete my Frankenstein creation.
Sunburst Squash Tacos
Ingredients for 2:
One medium to large Sunburst squash (also known as pattypan) or any other type of summer squash
One fresh tomato
Half to whole jalapeno pepper depending on taste preference
Half an onion
2 cloves of garlic
Any other fresh veggies you got lying around like spinach or cilantro
I added a dash of rosemary towards the end for the bit of herbal addition
1 pack of corn tortillas
Any type of cheese you prefer
Dice onion, garlic, and pepper up and add to olive oiled pan on low to medium heat.
Cut ends off squash and slice in half longways. Cut into slices, don't be too worried about thickness as the squash will start to loose form anyways. Add squash to pan with onions, garlic, and peppers. Dice tomato and any other veggies herbs you decide to add. When squash starts to loose shape add tomato and any other veggies/herbs. Add salt and pepper to taste and allow to simmer for 5-10 minutes until all the veggies have thoroughly sweat out their juices and melded together. Remove from heat and let sit for a minute. Prepare tortillas and any cheese or other toppings. Fill tortillas and now you have some delicious squash tacos which are healthy and filling. Try adding chicken or black beans for a heartier version for diner sometime. Enjoy!
Thursday, May 24, 2012
The Girl With The Sunshine Tatoo
I feel like I've been getting off topic recently but fuck it this is a funny story.
So I have been talking to this girl for a while and we hang out constantly. We finally decided to go out for a movie and spend some quality time together. Now let me stop for a moment and explain that I am an awkward person. Like I ooze awkward, it could be bottled and marketed as a fragrance for nerdy men. So here I am going into this date, really excited but super-duper like slapstick nervous. Why? I don't FUCKIN KNOW. I think I laughed after every comment, funny or not. I'm not talking my various normal laughs either, more like a whispery shadow of a laugh designed to mask the possibility of screaming at any time. Also I made the poor decision the previous night to down half a bottle of vodka leaving me rather hungover. Then because of the pure anxiety I didn't eat more than a bag of trail mix leaving my stomach in a stellar digestive mood.
But on the outside I'm all cool, nonchalant, confident mode. Fake it till you make it they told me, it always works they told me.....
So we get there and make small talk till we go in. Bam! i realize split second decision time, do I sit up front where we can enjoy the movie? or go up to the top for premium privacy? wheres the damn manual for situations like that? Well I go safe choice, up front to watch the movie, cause honestly nine fuckin dollars regal? I'm damn well gonna get my moneys worth in visual feast.
The movie begins, its entertaining enough but I keep getting the impression from our constantly bumping elbows that neither of us know what to do with our hands with all this sexual tension between us. So after developing an ulcer over this for 30 minutes I decide fuck it, YOLO and go traditional yet classy with the old yawn and stretch.
From the get go I realize, my technique is lacking to say the least. Instead of smoothly placing my arm across her deltoids it ends up death gripped to the end of her seat in a position I'd describe as in the center of her skull. I whited out for about ten minutes of the movie at this point. I've already committed but my arm is falling asleep, FAST, and my brain is screaming for a solution. After five of the awkwardest minutes of my life I removed my arm to, "check my phone".
Like what a completely transparent gesture, and so taboo in a movie theater too. For the rest of the movie I'm dreading the car ride back wondering if I've just botched everything, and will be forever remembered in her circle as the dip shit who put an arm bar across her head at a movie. I couldn't help thinking of the guys sitting behind us just whispering to each other about how much of an asshole I looked at that moment.
Can you feel the awkwardness oozing yet?
Their is a happy ending to this story though. After departing under rather normal circumstances later on, she texted me 30 minutes later saying she had a really good time, with a smiley face. A FUCKIN SMILEY FACE. I think shes a keeper, and I didn't bring too much shame upon my family after all.
So I have been talking to this girl for a while and we hang out constantly. We finally decided to go out for a movie and spend some quality time together. Now let me stop for a moment and explain that I am an awkward person. Like I ooze awkward, it could be bottled and marketed as a fragrance for nerdy men. So here I am going into this date, really excited but super-duper like slapstick nervous. Why? I don't FUCKIN KNOW. I think I laughed after every comment, funny or not. I'm not talking my various normal laughs either, more like a whispery shadow of a laugh designed to mask the possibility of screaming at any time. Also I made the poor decision the previous night to down half a bottle of vodka leaving me rather hungover. Then because of the pure anxiety I didn't eat more than a bag of trail mix leaving my stomach in a stellar digestive mood.
But on the outside I'm all cool, nonchalant, confident mode. Fake it till you make it they told me, it always works they told me.....
So we get there and make small talk till we go in. Bam! i realize split second decision time, do I sit up front where we can enjoy the movie? or go up to the top for premium privacy? wheres the damn manual for situations like that? Well I go safe choice, up front to watch the movie, cause honestly nine fuckin dollars regal? I'm damn well gonna get my moneys worth in visual feast.
The movie begins, its entertaining enough but I keep getting the impression from our constantly bumping elbows that neither of us know what to do with our hands with all this sexual tension between us. So after developing an ulcer over this for 30 minutes I decide fuck it, YOLO and go traditional yet classy with the old yawn and stretch.
From the get go I realize, my technique is lacking to say the least. Instead of smoothly placing my arm across her deltoids it ends up death gripped to the end of her seat in a position I'd describe as in the center of her skull. I whited out for about ten minutes of the movie at this point. I've already committed but my arm is falling asleep, FAST, and my brain is screaming for a solution. After five of the awkwardest minutes of my life I removed my arm to, "check my phone".
Like what a completely transparent gesture, and so taboo in a movie theater too. For the rest of the movie I'm dreading the car ride back wondering if I've just botched everything, and will be forever remembered in her circle as the dip shit who put an arm bar across her head at a movie. I couldn't help thinking of the guys sitting behind us just whispering to each other about how much of an asshole I looked at that moment.
Can you feel the awkwardness oozing yet?
Their is a happy ending to this story though. After departing under rather normal circumstances later on, she texted me 30 minutes later saying she had a really good time, with a smiley face. A FUCKIN SMILEY FACE. I think shes a keeper, and I didn't bring too much shame upon my family after all.
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
Let me diverge from exercise on this one and mention something which is familiar and upsetting to say the least. I love movies, and have been described by people as, "The most Jaded movie critic I've ever met". Well what can I say? I'm not head over heels for dumb and dumber, and once you've appreciated There Will Be Blood its hard to go back. However their is a caveat to my favorite film lists. I want everyone reading this to be sitting down before you read the next sentence. My favorite film of all time is A Knights Tale, yes the one with Heath Ledger. Go ahead curse my name but I find A Knights Tale to have everything I'm looking for in a film. Particularly the injection of modern feminism in the form of the female characters.
Now without trying to sound ignorant or haughty I also consider myself a Feminist and find the lack of respect for women in film painful. According to the latest Women's Media Center report, "“Female characters were typically younger than male counterparts, white, and more likely to have an undefined employment status". In 2008 and 2009 only 32.8 percent of speaking characters in movies were women. We discussed something similar in my literature class today, going through what society expects out of women. One of the first stereotypes mentioned was that society expects women to be quiet, subdued and unambitious. What in gods name inspires this kind of inbred education for people. Now I am not a product of some super liberal California institution, I just have a Mother, Sister, Aunts, Cousins, and friends that I choose to see as humans. We are equal, yet society and especially the media portray women in a fashion which denotes helplessness. Maybe I'm wrong in my analysis and am open for criticism but I will never waver in my belief that ALL members of society are human and deserve the same human rights, and are to be treated as human.
Pheww
I find myself really nervous writing things like that for fear I'll be misunderstood or poorly support my argument.
Back to the movie though. The characters of Jocelyn and Kate defy the expectations of their time period by not submitting to male desires just because they are female. For Jocelyn as a woman of nobility everyone expects her to find some equally rich and powerful lord to marry and produce many sons, nothing else. However she spurns the advances of all suitors, even our male protagonist. She even makes demands of him to put off the thing he loves to prove his love for her is greater than his hobbies. The character of Kate faces much discrimination as one of the very few (I'd assume) female blacksmiths in France. However she proves herself time and again better at her craft than any other blacksmith, male or not. While ultimately this is a movie and the reality of Medieval Europe is much bleaker in gender discrimination; this fanciful movie finds a fun and provocative way to play with gender stereotypes in a genre like period pieces which often pick the harshest of gender roles. Hence one of the reasons I consider this to be one of my top five movies, EVER.
I'll finish with a quote attributed to Joss Whedon though the source is dubious at best but I still love it. When asked why his work featured such strong female characters he replied, "Because I consider women to be human beings". YOLO
P.S. some sources for Womens Media Center: http://thinkprogress.org/alyssa/2012/02/16/426519/television-is-less-sexist-than-moviesbut-not-by-much/?mobile=nc
http://wmc.3cdn.net/a6b2dc282c824e903a_arm6b0hk8.pdf
Now without trying to sound ignorant or haughty I also consider myself a Feminist and find the lack of respect for women in film painful. According to the latest Women's Media Center report, "“Female characters were typically younger than male counterparts, white, and more likely to have an undefined employment status". In 2008 and 2009 only 32.8 percent of speaking characters in movies were women. We discussed something similar in my literature class today, going through what society expects out of women. One of the first stereotypes mentioned was that society expects women to be quiet, subdued and unambitious. What in gods name inspires this kind of inbred education for people. Now I am not a product of some super liberal California institution, I just have a Mother, Sister, Aunts, Cousins, and friends that I choose to see as humans. We are equal, yet society and especially the media portray women in a fashion which denotes helplessness. Maybe I'm wrong in my analysis and am open for criticism but I will never waver in my belief that ALL members of society are human and deserve the same human rights, and are to be treated as human.
Pheww
I find myself really nervous writing things like that for fear I'll be misunderstood or poorly support my argument.
Back to the movie though. The characters of Jocelyn and Kate defy the expectations of their time period by not submitting to male desires just because they are female. For Jocelyn as a woman of nobility everyone expects her to find some equally rich and powerful lord to marry and produce many sons, nothing else. However she spurns the advances of all suitors, even our male protagonist. She even makes demands of him to put off the thing he loves to prove his love for her is greater than his hobbies. The character of Kate faces much discrimination as one of the very few (I'd assume) female blacksmiths in France. However she proves herself time and again better at her craft than any other blacksmith, male or not. While ultimately this is a movie and the reality of Medieval Europe is much bleaker in gender discrimination; this fanciful movie finds a fun and provocative way to play with gender stereotypes in a genre like period pieces which often pick the harshest of gender roles. Hence one of the reasons I consider this to be one of my top five movies, EVER.
I'll finish with a quote attributed to Joss Whedon though the source is dubious at best but I still love it. When asked why his work featured such strong female characters he replied, "Because I consider women to be human beings". YOLO
P.S. some sources for Womens Media Center: http://thinkprogress.org/alyssa/2012/02/16/426519/television-is-less-sexist-than-moviesbut-not-by-much/?mobile=nc
http://wmc.3cdn.net/a6b2dc282c824e903a_arm6b0hk8.pdf
Monday, May 21, 2012
So some days you just need coffee and loud music, its that simple. Personally I've been rocking out to Icona Pop's 'I Love It' and Sia's 'Titanium' playing them on repeat way too much. Speaking of music I really don't know how people run without it? I understand the headphones falling off problem but that's a ten dollar solution away from shapely thighs.
What is the best music to workout to? Let me talk about myself for just a moment ;) i would say I have a varied music taste with Hip Hop being the main currency on my ipod exchange. However I am easily won over by smooth R&B and classic rock sounds. Now that everyone is judging my tastes on two sentences let me inspire more dissatisfaction, when it comes to my exercise play lists they are almost entirely made up of top 40 hits, club remixes, and reggaeton. SAY WHAT?? I know, I've sold my soul to the corporate devils which wrap music up in a friendly package easily consumable and with little allegiance. My Literature professor calls this the 'warm bath' effect. Kinda like only reading Nicholas Spark's books, its easy pleasurable and does not challenge your worldview. But honestly I've come to get a vicious love for such unbridled pop love, and hard liquor, maybe theirs a connection? (death of brain cells?)
My uncle was in Atlanta this weekend and wanted to grab diner. Over plates of macaroni and collard greens (OK Cafe!!) I mentioned my recent love for running. My uncle is an odd fellow to say the least and while he pines about retiring some day he is the type of person who must always have something to do, like go for a run. So all that back story is to illustrate he understands my mindset. While proud of my efforts he finished his inquiry into how I've been with a, "well it doesn't make you live any longer but makes those years a little better". Like shit dude, don't tell me that I was hoping adding exercise to my life would make me invincible. Shiiiiiiiit. I'm thinking the thing to take from this and my confession on pop music is that life is ultimately short and no one can add to their biological clock. So with that realization YOLO I'm gonna listen to whatever music I want because might as well have fun and not sweat the small stuff.
What is the best music to workout to? Let me talk about myself for just a moment ;) i would say I have a varied music taste with Hip Hop being the main currency on my ipod exchange. However I am easily won over by smooth R&B and classic rock sounds. Now that everyone is judging my tastes on two sentences let me inspire more dissatisfaction, when it comes to my exercise play lists they are almost entirely made up of top 40 hits, club remixes, and reggaeton. SAY WHAT?? I know, I've sold my soul to the corporate devils which wrap music up in a friendly package easily consumable and with little allegiance. My Literature professor calls this the 'warm bath' effect. Kinda like only reading Nicholas Spark's books, its easy pleasurable and does not challenge your worldview. But honestly I've come to get a vicious love for such unbridled pop love, and hard liquor, maybe theirs a connection? (death of brain cells?)
My uncle was in Atlanta this weekend and wanted to grab diner. Over plates of macaroni and collard greens (OK Cafe!!) I mentioned my recent love for running. My uncle is an odd fellow to say the least and while he pines about retiring some day he is the type of person who must always have something to do, like go for a run. So all that back story is to illustrate he understands my mindset. While proud of my efforts he finished his inquiry into how I've been with a, "well it doesn't make you live any longer but makes those years a little better". Like shit dude, don't tell me that I was hoping adding exercise to my life would make me invincible. Shiiiiiiiit. I'm thinking the thing to take from this and my confession on pop music is that life is ultimately short and no one can add to their biological clock. So with that realization YOLO I'm gonna listen to whatever music I want because might as well have fun and not sweat the small stuff.
Thursday, May 3, 2012
Blog#2
So everyone’s had that day, you know the day after a long
night drinkin, smoking, just YOLOing in general. The next day comes quickly
even though fully formed sentences don’t. Well for some strange, absolutely
unexplainable reason I enjoy working out that morning after. It could be the
sweating out of toxins or cathartic self punishment I’m forcing on my
cardiovascular system, maybe I’m a bit of a masochist. Regardless I find myself
drawn to hitting the gym or going for a long run following a night of utter
debauchery. This can’t be normal right? I mean most people hate working out
enough as it is, let alone after hittin the whiskey bars hard the night before.
Mmmmm whiskey….
According to Livestrong.com exercising can help reduce the
effects of a hangover, Thanks Lance!
I find it gives me a good opportunity to
reflect on the decisions I made the night before and how much money it will
take to correct them. Also alcohol is a carbohydrate worth about 7 calories per
gram. Compare that with regular carbs which have 4 calories per gram and fat
which has about 9 calories per gram. I’m not trying to scare you from drinking,
that would be a tad hypocritical, but college is a good time to learn how to
balance large consumption of alcohol and maintaining a semblance of healthy
living.
Also check this out, the higher your metabolism is the
quicker your body processes the alcohol meaning you can party longer and harder
with the addition of some exercise to your lifestyle. Better than doing meth
and increases your chance of talking to the opposite sex, always a plus.
Blog post #1 or my attempt to add years to my life and
still drink heavily.
This past October two friends invited me to the park to play
soccer and hangout. I have always loved playing soccer and was off work making
it a prime time to get some hang time. Also they probably had beer at their
apartment which is always a plus. Afterwards we made a relatively healthy
chicken soup and sat on the floor slurping soup and complaining about the lack
of quality TV. While a possibly mundane sounding life event this particular
date will go down as the most important day in the past year for me. That is
over me finally being accepted into the college I’ve been trying to transfer to
for two years, my last grandparent passing away (RIP), a childhood best friend
passing away, and moving to Atlanta with about 30 bucks to my name. Bam, maybe
I sound selfish, or don’t have my priorities straight but this cloudy October
day has profoundly changed lifestyle. What is so special about your seemingly
innocent trip to the park with your bronies you ask? It was the first time in a
long, LONG time I thought to myself, man all this running around, kicking a
ball, sprinting, competing with people, and sweating is….fun. I KNOW like WTF
running sucks, exercise is for lacrosse bros who join frats and get tribal
tattoos before failing out of business school for the third time. Nope, I
actually found myself enjoying exercise purely for the enjoyment of exercise.
However this is only half the story, I mean all these new thoughts are great
but let’s see how I feel when reality kicks me in the crotch next morning. And
what the hell? The first thing I wanted to do was go for a run. A FUCKING RUN.
I have always enjoyed playing organized sports but running has always been
about appealing as studying organic chemistry or owning cats. Now lest you think
this was some epic run I think I maybe made it up the block and back, a whole ¾
a mile. YAY Iz healthy now? Wrong again. But it was the willingness to go out
and do it that second day when conventional wisdom and poor habits were
screaming NOOOOOOO, which has kept me going nearly every day since then.
Yesterday I ran four miles, it sucked for the most part, but at this point not
running makes me feel fat, stressed out, and impotent.
So woopdy fuckin do, you started running, now you’re going
to get a subscription to runners weekly and only wear gym shorts everywhere you
go you self righteous cunt. It’s hard not to come off a bit douche-ish writing
a blog about exercise but I hope if you know me personally this is not about
lording my new lifestyle habits over everyone else, okay a maybe a little, but
more along the lines of I did it you can too, and if not then just share in my
ups and downs as I try to make significant changes for a better quality of
life.
There, got all the mushy stuff out, now time to talk dirty.
I sweat a lot, I mean A LOT. If scientists could convert the amount of sweat I produce
into drinkable water, rivers would never run dry. There is a special relation
people have with sweat, especially when the amount daily produced is possibly
in the gallons. Anyone reading this that has similar sweating issues knows how embarrassing
this can be on a daily basis let alone opening yourself up to the public to
watch you sweat. I mean if there is a sweat fetish out there I could be making
millions on personal workout tapes or still photos of my glistening chest hairs
slick with sweat. Just try and hide your arousal. My friends and family know me
to be a pretty bold person, yet getting past the fear of people judging me in a
gym setting or one of my neighbors cackling at my awkward body propelling
itself down the street was not simple. The true saving grace was my accidental thievery
of some quality headphones during a trip to Nola with ear hooks. Finally being
able to tune out the world while exercising and not having to constantly stop
and adjust my ear buds made going out every day and perspiring all over the
place a tad more appealing. Then again according to Wikipedia male sweat may be
a pheromone cue so maybe the key to meeting more women is to just sweat more. (Probably
not…)
Don’t worry this won’t specifically be an exercise blog,
however I do plan on writing extensively on exercise and health related topics.
Mostly though I’ll just talk about how hammered I got the night before and why
working out hung-over is just the best thing ever.
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